Baby Boomers Officially Ruin Facebook for Millennials

in Humor

By Thomas Lloyd

October 2015, Facebook has released official reports utilizing user data which concludes that baby boomers have officially ruined Facebook for millennials. Those born between 1946 and 1964, AKA our parents, have become the prominent user group on Facebook, shadowing millennials by a vast number.

Not only have baby boomers ruined the economy, the planet, and the majority of wholesome family values, they’ve ruined one of the millennial’s favorite social networking sites, Facebook. From candy crush to horrible shitposting, baby boomers have stripped Facebook of every cool concept that Jesse Eisenberg tried so hard to deliver it in The Social Network.

How many times have your parents posted to your wall or tagged you in a post which reads something along the lines of “Nothing can come between a Mother’s love for her child”? Personally, I know members of this publication who’ve had their posts screen-shot by their baby booming parents, re-posted and tagged in a terrible, unaware, quasi-production of a meme. Hopefully the high divorce rates in America will not promote baby boomers to spread to other social networking mediums like Tinder, making for some very awkward dinner conversations down the line. To save our creative and social outlets, I officially propose a new social networking site for people between the age of 18 and 25 only. On the day of your 26th birthday, you’re booted.

This however will only be useful for about 6-8 years until the generation below us millennials starts to find us unappealing which, no doubt will occur around the year 2022. Ah, to be young.